Tag Archive | "online dating"

Online Dating Profile: Choosing a Username

One of the first steps in creating your online dating profile is choosing a username that gives the right first impression. The profile username is the first thing someone will notice and will help them chose whether or not to keep reading. Research actually shows that most people look at the username first, then the photo. Only if they like what they see will they read the rest of your profile to find out more about you. Pick the wrong username and “snap!” people will click past your profile and move on.

All of us who have registered an online dating profile anywhere online, whether a dating site or perhaps an e-mail account, has had the frustrating experience of repeatedly seeing “username taken” until they in desperation key in any combination of letters and numbers just to get registered. Big mistake! You can’t change it later and a username is more than just a means of registering for the site.

Think of the username as a product name for your own brand. Some people may be attracted to a brand of toothpaste named ‘Clean ‘n’ Fresh, while I doubt you would try one called ‘Makes ya Gag’. The username has a similar positive or negative effect on people looking for a partner online.

Okay, so here are 8 easy steps to follow when choosing a username for your dating profile.

  1. Identify your name with a specific interest or liking. Write a list of your main interests, and pick one or more to combine into a username. If you like to travel, how about Europecalling? If you are an avid reader of John Gray (famous for his books about men being from Mars and women being from Venus), how about MarsVenusYouandMe? Or if you are addicted to drinking cortados (cortado is a shot of espresso with a shot of warm milk), how about Cortadoafficionado? Or pick a character name from a novel you like, or a favorite performing artist. Be a little creative and specific, don’t just call yourself Kylie or Sting, but pick a specific song, lyric or line and work something out from there. Likewise, Golfpro is more specific than Sportslover.
  2. Add a number. The “Username taken”- blues can often be mitigated with adding a number. Use you lucky number, you probably have some options. The current year is a classic, like MarsVenus2012. Your year of birth is not so good, as this may reveal too much about you.
  3. Shorten it. See if the usernames can be shortened, as typing Cortadoafficionado over and over as a signature would be tiresome and difficult for slow typers. However Cortadoist or Cortado007 is easier and quicker to type.
  4. Browse usernames on the site(s) you wish to join and see which ones catch your attention and which do not. This will give you ideas for what works and what doesn’t. If you are put off by Emoteen or Downbylaw but attracted to Funandgames then this tells you something. If a name peaks your curiosity and makes you want to get in touch and ask for the story behind the username then this give you ideas for a username you can use yourself. Look at your opposite gender first and don’t just look of profiles in your target range. Take notes of good names, it’s always hard to find back to them later.
  5. Make it appropriate for the site you are joining and the relationship you are looking for. For a liberal, adult site a username like Wellhung may be appropriate. On a broader site where you are looking for serious relationships, something more innocent is appropriate. Inappropriate names may give unwanted, inappropriate attention from other members. If you are unsure of the type of relationship you are looking for then stay away from emotion or sexual innuendo in your username and stick with your interests.
  6. Be careful with unintended innuendo. If you use Takemeplaces you could be suggesting for someone to pay your way on your travels.
  7. Avoid emotion and sentiment. Words like lonely or love in a username suggests someone who is needy or desperate.
  8. Avoid bragging. Don’t get all carried away and call yourself Lovetorun if you just like casual jobbing. Chances are you will meet someone who runs ten miles a day and expects you to keep up. You will not look attractive lying in the street gasping for air.

Here is a powerful tip to top it off: Make a reference to the online dating username in the subtitle or main text of the profile. Once you have chosen a username that is available on the site you are joining make sure you refer to it in your profile text. A good way to do this is adding a question to a profile that links to your username. Asking a question makes it easier for people to contact you. If you are Cortadoafficionado then refer to your coffee addiction early in your profile, for example: “I love cortados, do you want to know my recipe?” Or “What coffee drink are you addicted to?” Other examples: “I recently returned from mysterious Cairo. What’s the most interesting place you have been to recently?”

Hopefully you now have an arsenal of ideas to help you choose a good username for online dating. Good luck!

Online Dating Profile: Choosing a Username

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Online Dating Basics: Putting Yourself Out There

Online Dating Basics: Putting Yourself Out There

It can be a confusing online world out there when it comes to starting up a new internet dating account, but to know the first steps will point you in the right direction and opens up a whole new world of dating opportunities. If you have never tried online dating before, it may seem strange, but it’s really just a few things you need to know and the rest will come naturally once begin to send a few messages.

Step One: Pick a Site

Not all sites are created equally and finding the one that works for you could have a huge impact on your success. Some sites may be more oriented to casual encounters while others are directed more towards marriage. Bigger dating sites may try to cater to all types of relationships and will give you the option to choose what you’re looking for. You’ll also need to decide if you want to use a pay site that might have more serious members or a free site that allows everyone to sign up.

Step Two: Choose a Screen Name

Your screen name is going to stick with you for a long time so it’s important to choose something that suits you and isn’t going to offend any potential matches or put them off in any way. There’s no sense in writing out a great profile that shows how deep you are if you have a shallow or profane screen name that people skip over.

Step Three: Write Your Profile

This is where you can really show everyone who you are. It’s a good idea to keep your profile light and friendly, but be sure to include interests and passions that are important to you. Your profile allows people to meet you before they meet you, so keep it positive and flattering while still being honest about who you are.

Step Four: Add a Picture

Clear pictures with good lighting will make your profile infinitely more attractive to possible matches. A lot of people refuse to even look at a profile that doesn’t include a picture, and while you may have great profile answers, no one will ever see them if they don’t feel like they should take the time to look. Even if you don’t like the looks of your pictures, there are people out there who will, so give yourself a chance.

Step Five: Chat Away

Once you’re all set up and the world can search you, it’s time to make some connections. You’ll probably receive some messages from other individuals, but don’t be shy about messaging the people you’re interested in as well. You may not always get a response to every message you send, but keep chatting away until you find the right match.

Online Dating Basics: Putting Yourself Out There

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Online Dating Etiquette: Rules Women Should Always Follow

Just like dating out in the real world, online dating has its own set of rules and customs. Quite often these rules will be the same, but in some cases there are a few guidelines you may want to follow that wouldn’t always apply to your everyday, offline life.

Online Etiquette versus Offline Etiquette

Some people may think that because you’re talking to someone online and you aren’t face to face, you don’t have to be polite. When chatting online, manners and courtesy may even be more important. Because all of your contact is through messaging and e-mail, a lot of your tone may be lost so acting even a little snotty could make you sound extremely rude. And if you don’t care how you sound, keep in mind that getting a bad online rep for yourself may limit your chances with some of the nicer guys out there.

Chivalry and Being a Lady

This isn’t old fashioned dating and you don’t have to wait for the guy you have your eye on to message you. Since he can’t see you batting your baby blues at him from across the room, sending the first message is perfectly acceptable. On an internet dating site, everyone is there to meet someone. Making the first move as a female is not only okay, it’s expected. You can make your profile stand out as much as you want, but there’s no way to know if he’ll ever stumble across it, so even if you want to still have a lady-like demeanor, send him a short and sweet message expressing some interest.

Be Honest and Be Yourself

It can be tempting to stretch the truth a little when talking to someone online since they have no way of seeing you or verifying who you are. However, if you have any intention of ever meeting up with anyone you’ve met from an online dating site, being honest is your best bet. It might be very difficult to try to explain yourself if any inconsistencies are discovered later on. Besides, if you’re trying to make a connection that could turn into something serious, wouldn’t you want them to be interested in the real you?

The main thing to stick to when dating online is just to be generally respectful. Sometimes you may get rejected, or you may reject someone else, but not everyone is going to be compatible and there shouldn’t be any hurt feelings. Accepting that someone may not be interested in you and being polite when turning someone else down will give you a much more positive online dating experience and will just get you that much closer to finding the right person.

Online Dating Etiquette: Rules Women Should Always Follow

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Online Dating For Lifelong Bachelors: Where to Start

Are you a lifelong bachelor? For those who have little dating experience both online and offline, using a dating site can be a much easier approach to finding that special someone. Online dating removes the first question that comes with dating which is “Where do I go to meet someone?” Setting up an online profile and putting yourself out there is your first step through the door to that big online singles bar known as internet dating.

Deciding on a Site

With so many online dating sites out there, it’s important to choose the one that will be right for you. Some sites are free and some you pay for. Pay sites may weed out the less serious online daters but you may prefer a free site if you aren’t sure what you’re looking for yet. Every different site will offer their own set of dating tools, e-mail servers, and messaging services, so browsing through a few before signing up for anything will give you the opportunity to get started on a site that suits you best.

Some niche sites cater to specific interests you might share. These sites could be religion specific or focus mainly on those looking to get married. The more popular sites will generally have more members you can browse through, but if you are looking for a specific type of woman, the smaller sites may have a more particular group of members.

Creating Your Profile

Setting up a thorough profile is a must. Leaving everything blank and not including a picture will give the message that you either aren’t interested enough in the dating process to invest some time into your profile or that you’re trying to hide something.

Fill out what you can on your profile, without being painfully long-winded, and post a few recent, well-lit photos of yourself. The women you message will want to have an idea about who you are before writing back, and if you want to receive any messages, you’ll have to give them a reason to initiate contact.

Meeting the Right Woman

Once you’ve chosen a good screen name that suits you and you’ve created a confident yet modest profile for yourself you’ll be ready to start looking for that special someone. Be sure to read her profile before sending her a message and keep your messages short, polite, and personal. Most women can tell when you’ve created a generic message that you send out to every profile you come across so mention something you liked about her profile or ask her some questions about herself.

You may not always get a response back, so give her some time to respond. Sending one more e-mail a week later is alright if you’re particularly taken by someone, but there’s no sense in spamming anyone who isn’t interested. If you still don’t hear back, accept that she isn’t the one for you and try making a connection with someone else.

Online Dating For Lifelong Bachelors:  Where to Start

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Online Dating for Men: Playing It Safe

A lot of people may think it’s just women who need to be safe when it comes to online dating, but men should take some precautions as well. Predators can also be female, and sometimes it isn’t always a woman you’re talking to online. The best policy is to keep caution in the back of your mind and question the things that seem suspicious.

Getting to Know Her

The first thing you should do before getting serious about anyone you meet online is get to know them and develop some trust. Follow your instincts and if something seems strange or sends up red flags for you, you may want to re-evaluate that online relationship. There’s many other women out there, so don’t compromise yourself if you think something seems off.

Anyone asking for too much personal info who won’t give you any about themselves may be trying to deceive you. On the other hand, if they’re giving out way too much information, it could be to give you a false sense of security. Your own judgment and instincts will be what guides you, but you don’t need to be so wary that you refuse to get to know anyone.

Meeting Someone in Person

If you’ve decided to take your online relationship to the next level and meet, it’s a good idea to meet in a public place and take separate cars. Keep your home address and home phone number to yourself until you think this is a person you can trust. Sticking to cell phone and online communication can help you protect your privacy.

While you’re out on your date, having someone call to check in at some point can be a good safety net. While you may not feel threatened by meeting a woman somewhere keep in mind that she may not be alone or could have someone watching her. You don’t need to spend your whole night worrying about these things, but keeping them at the back of your mind and taking precautions will keep you safe when you are dating online.

Sending Money

Someone asking for money should send up a huge red flag. No matter what her reason is, how desperate she seems, or how heartbreaking her story is, she shouldn’t be asking for money from someone she recently met online. There are a lot of scams out there and while you may think you’re being a nice guy, it’s important to protect yourself when meeting someone through online dating.

Online Dating for Men: Playing It Safe

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Online Dating Safety: Cautionary Tips for Women

Women should be cautious anyways when it comes to the online dating scene, but for online dating that fact is only truer. That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try to meet someone online or move the relationship to an offline type of meeting, but it does mean that you should stay safe and take the right precautions.

Protect Your Personal Information

If someone is asking you for more information that you’d like to give, don’t be afraid to tell them no. It should raise some red flags if you choose to not give out your information and the person asking you becomes angry. Most people looking to meet someone online would understand the need for privacy and will most likely want to protect theirs as well until a certain level of trust is established. Keep your home address, phone number, financial information, family’s member’s names, and anything else you feel is personal to yourself until you know you’re ready to share it.

The great thing about chatting online is that if someone makes you feel uncomfortable, most sites will allow you to simply block them, or you can report them to the site administrator. Even if you just get an odd feeling from someone, you can choose not to reply to their messages and move on to meeting someone new. Some people may think online dating can be too risky, but in some ways it is actually safer by allowing you to get to know someone first before meeting them.

Meet In a Safe Place

One of the most important safety aspects when it comes to online dating is creating a safe environment for the first date. Meeting in a public place is a must and if the man you’re meeting is overly pushy about meeting in private, it may be a good idea to cancel or at least delay the meeting. Most men will be understanding and will want you to feel safe, so meeting someone that doesn’t care about your sense of well being may not be the type of man that’s worth meeting.

Take separate cars to the meeting place and have a friend check in with you part way through the date to make sure you’re okay. If you feel uncomfortable at any point, don’t hesitate to make an excuse and leave. You may feel that you don’t want to offend your date, but it’s better to keep yourself safe and trust your intuition.

Trust Your Instincts

When deciding when it’s the right time to move your relationship from online to offline, use your judgment and instincts to decide if you’re ready. If you feel that you’ve made a connection and can trust this person, it may be time to make a date. It’s important to keep a part of your mind on guard, but meeting up with someone you’ve met online doesn’t mean you have to be paranoid going into the date. Keeping a few safety tips in mind will allow you to protect yourself while having a great time meeting someone new.

Online Dating Safety:  Cautionary Tips for Women

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